Leed thank you for your kind responce. I think my H is weird for not wanting to know more. On the other hand I think he was and still is trying to spare my feelings. He still know only a tiny, and I mean tiny part of what happened. I appriciate him not asking a million questions and making me feel like I am/was reliving all this mess. I don't know that I could have told him anyway. I had to write and let him read the words 20 years later.

I like your quote it is SO true.
The truth shall set you free but first it will make you miserable....Garfield

The only thing I can think of that Garfield said is: Bring on the lassonia. (sp) the itallian food, the really long wide noodles made like a casserole.