Thanks to all who read my "book" and commented. I need food for thought before my next session. Thankfully, I don't seem to be ruminating about it today. Today is also the first day I found myself glad I have until next Thursday to process.
I plan to respond to 4-5 posts at a time. Thanks again for your concern and advice.
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Originally Posted by LoneWolfie
Chopin, I read the whole post and I am speechless. My head is spinning just from reading it and would have run for the door at the first chance I got.
I applaud you for sticking through the whole session. Hopefully now that everything seems to be out on the table you can both move forward.
I know when my t/psychiatrist has gotten loud verbally about my self harm she scares the **** out of me. She has also come out with flippant remarks when she is frustrated I am learning.
I guess they are human after all but I still think she went way over the line and put you through the wringer.
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Thanks LoneWolfie. I had two alternate reactions;
RUN away and
STAY and see if it gets better. T's are as human as us, but I have to say, I have never raised my voice to any of my IDD clients.
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Originally Posted by Asiablue
Wow!
You did amazing to stay in that room. There is def something going on with your T. She was confusing and angry and withholding of her care in my opinion. I think it was sHE who was acting "borderline" lol the push and pull, the anger then the "i love you" behaviour.
You handled it all soooo well, it was like you were the adult/therapist and she was the surly teen child/client.
And her little mantra about clients not being able to affect her is B.S . In my opinion that's like a little safety mechanism she has when she's feeling overwhelmed or threatened . Like denial that she can be touched by her clients.
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Thanks, Asiablue. Yes, absolute bulls**t. I have felt joy, love, sadness, anger, frustration, and disgust when dealing with my clients. Good
or bad, she needs to own up.
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Originally Posted by Fixated
Wow. If even just half of this is true, that's crazy. I am sorry you had to go through this.
Choppin, I know you have a deep bond with your T and that there are certain situational things that limit you in finding Ts, but I don't think she is totally healthy for you. Consistency really is a necessary quality for Ts to have. Yours seems to waffle a lot. It is causing you so much angst and hurt.
I respect your choices, but if a friend or family member came to me with this situation, I would adamantly tell them to look for other options somewhere.
I wish you luck in resolving this.
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Thanks, Fixated. It's all true. I know that she isn't completely healthy for me, but I have healed quite a bit under her care...and she's taught me a lot about flexibility.
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Originally Posted by struggling2
wow, just wow chopin. im almost in tears for you and i never cry! her behavior was so bizarre. SO bizarre! And MEAN!
i also applaud you for sticking through the whole session. ive been with my T long enough that if she's tired or having a bad day or just seems off... i can tell right away. and it throws my whole mood off immediately and i want to leave. i cant imagine having a session like you just did....but i really think you stood your ground and didnt let her mood completely control you. any person would've been upset/bewildered/etc...but you stuck with it and didnt cower to it. GO YOU!
Whatever is going on with you T, I think she was a little out of line. Arent they supposed to be able to control/contain their emotions better than that?
i agree with Asia too.....in that session it seems you were the therapist and she was being the borderline out of control client.
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Thanks Struggling. She was rather out of control. I knew it from the time I heard my name said in the waiting room. Yes, anyone who works in the mental and physical health fields is supposed to control emotions.