Hi Christa87413, welcome to Psych Central!
Quote:
Originally Posted by Christa87413
I warn everyone I start getting close to about my problems, and when we start getting serious, I tell them how to calm me down, how to handle me.. But it seems like they don't understand what I am saying..
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It sounds like whatever you're doing is helping to screen out people who aren't ready to relate to you for whatever reason. Even though you're disappointed when it doesn't work out, it may not be such a bad thing that you both found out early on.
If you managed to present yourself as someone different, someone whom they'd find easier to get along with, the same issues would probably surface anyway, only later, when both of you had a bigger investment in the relationship. At that point it could go either of two ways:
-- From how they know you by then, they decide that issues
* or no, you're worth sticking around for and they're glad you didn't scare them away earlier; or
-- They decide you're too much for them (and/or they don't feel up to dealing with you) and they blame you for not having let them know sooner.
It'll be easier for you if you can take the viewpoint that it's not
just you being "crazy" while they're all "normal" (so that you're not good enough for them), and not
just them chickening out for dumb reasons from what could've been a great relationship (so that they're not good enough for you). No doubt each of you is going to say some stuff and do some stuff that triggers the other, and how it works out is going to depend on how gracefully each of you deals with it when it happens.
I hope this sheds some light on your situation; or if darkness, then at least interesting darkness.
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*Their issues too, obviously.