I do not think you are a bad person at all !

I do think you need to work on yourself .. It does sound to me like you need to get some help about low self esteem/ self loathing etc .. In many ways I think your desperate to find "love" and not really being rational.

You are so very young .. its fun at that age or any age to be flirted with and people telling you how beautiful you are.

Please be safe.