You misread what I meant. I mean saying "I want to learn how to stop being like this" but then doing nothing about it and relying on other people to make it better is what you can stop doing IF you really want to. If you don't want to stop, then you must be getting some kind of a payoff. At least that's what my therapist told me. Even if it's just to get sympathy about how low your self esteem is and how insecure you are.

So, OK, if the guy's a real jerk and is drooling over every set of big fake boobs plastered on to an anorectic body that he sees, while you're right there, dump him, then work on your self esteem and insecurities before getting involved with someone again, otherwise you're going to be stuck in the same cycle forever.