I am beyond depressed. Depressed is a few hundred layers above where I am. I am hopeless. I have so many unsolvable problems. I have warrants. They do not accept partial payments. I do not have enough money for all of my taxes and my warrants. Much less Christmas, which is my Firstborn's Birthday. This has been the worst year of my life and I don't have any hope whatsoever. I seriously cannot imagine anything good ever happening in the future whatsoever. I would be an idiot to think that goodness would grace me and my family. I just don't want to live anymore. I am hoping that the world will actually blow up on Dec 21st, but it seems like just an easy out and I should be so lucky. I am absolutely hopeless. I might as well be dead.