The night before last I dreamed that I lit a candle on my kitchen counter and accidentally burned my house down with myself and my three dogs in it.

Last night I woke up three times (once an hour) having nightmares that induced panic attacks so bad I couldn't breathe. In one I was in a dark parking lot walking to my car and two groups of people converged on me, maneuvering into position to commit violence. In the second one I was at home and someone crawled through my dog door and slit all my veins open so I would bleed out, they did the same with my dogs. I woke up with a terrible panic attack and had to use my rescue inhaler so I could breathe. I then took some really deep breaths and reassured myself that there was no one in the house so that I could walk from my bedroom to the kitchen (passing the dog door) to take the ativan I have for panic attacks.

The third nightmare was the one that scared me the most. In my dream I was having a psychotic episode and that person who lives in my head and is not me was back and trying to kill me again. I woke up in another panic attack and had to use my inhaler and take more ativan. I then waited for the sun to come up before I went back to sleep. (I've had a serious psychotic episode in which this other person did emerge.. I do not have DID or multiple personalities but this person didn't speak like me and wanted me very dead - at the time I wasn't suicidal. It was very scary but happened 2-3 years ago)

What do I do? Any ideas? I called the local psych hospital to see about outpatient care and they're "out of business". I called another hospital in town but they only do evaluations between 8 and 5 so I have to call back tomorrow... but first I have to make it through tonight.