I'm sorry you don't seem to know whether you're coming or going either - it's no fun, I know, and can be pretty scary at times.

Your T works on Boxing Day?! Wow! Does that mean you don't have to have a break over the holidays?

I know you may feel that way but you're not pathetic, WC, not at all. I always find that people (that I otherwise probably wouldn't find physically attractive) become infinitely more attractive when I've known them for a while and they're kind, gentle, compassionate, etc. All the things that are present in the T-client relationship. Thus it's only natural to really like your T, and it isn't a surprise people end up getting crushes. The relationship tends to embody the 'perfect' relationship (minus the odd rupture that may occur). It's nothing to be ashamed of - I know that's easier said than done - you just have to watch it doesn't get out of hand.

Thanks for the kind words about the gift - I hope T feels the same way and it isn't awkward!