boundaries are hard to set, but once they have been laid, the picture becomes more manageable. "Sorry, nope, can't, no extras, etc." become easier to say with practice.

One way to look at it, they have the "nerve" to ask, you can have the "nerve" to say no. Or, even, ask, "Why do you think I have extra?", so you could bring up the fact your scene is no bowl of cherries, ya know? Knock them off their assumptions.

It's really hard to be an adult and take care of this interpersonal stuff. I couldn't survive public housing vibes. Too many desperate people. Desperate people do not think clearly, they are always kinda "limbic" and feral and looking to fill their burden of needs. No judgement, just fact.

In that sense, setting your boundaries will be a form of training others in how to behave toward you. (Your Mom included.) Like in training any animal, you must be consistant. Always :alpha" and ready to snap and growl and defend your turf. The funny thing is, after you do put the word out as to your limits, people will have more respect for you.

Hard cake to bake for a sweetie like you. You almost have to create a persona to do this kind of face to face boundary setting. Des the Defender of Home and Family. (What color cape sould you like to go with your magic larriat that makes people tell the truth?)

HARD HARD HARD but, you can do it.