You should set time out to do intimate stuff, then focus on one thing at a time.
(setting a schedule can be something to help you jump start intimacy, again)

...like foreplay.

http://www.amazon.com/FOREPLAY-DICE-.../dp/B004T9CL8W
(Foreplay dice. Cheap and easy to use. You could probably make your own.)

Do some massage stuff or read stories together...

I think its better to work up towards having sex again and focus on intimacy. When he's touching you, touch him back but try to be a little provocative to see if he reciprocates.

Also, it may help to ask him if he had any early trauma that makes sex as an experience not quite fun.

(Sex is a good stress reliever too!)