I swear I have a memory of thinking my mother was a lodger in our house and waiting for my dad to get home from work to tell him to tell her to leave, because she was mean to me. And him telling me she wasn't a lodger, she was part of our family and would stay. But here I was two years old and not feeling any connection. T and I were laughing about it because just to picture it! But as you say there was something missing. It's hard to see what's missing.