Hi Hesa82
I can so relate to your situation! I have trouble with making friends for this reason too. I've always had trouble making friends, but I was especially disappointed when a group of about four or five people who I have gotten close to in the past couple years stopped talking to me when I moved states. I've tried alternately to reach out, and then stop, as you said because I know they can't be available for me.
One woman admitted that she's just really bad at conversing through phone or e-mail. That doesn't help when we're so far away with little oppurtunity to visit in person! Even though I know she cares part of me is still disappointed and hurt by this!
I don't know how to move forward either. Earthmama, your comments are interesting. I think it'll take awhile for me to get to that place of not having it affect me.