I am a fighter. No... I am more of a struggler. I struggle along. My meds help me not struggle so much. they kind of pave the way so I can step lighter and not have to fight so much.....

it's amazing what you can get used to
when you have no other choice
the reality that you once knew
echoing with it's deep voice

reminding you of the previous times
when you were sure you couldn't make it through
and you were so lost and desperate
and not knowing what to do

but then things got a little easier
but sacrifices had to be made
you would be a little stifled
and somewhat contained

even the episodes would be better
but the price to pay would be severe
so you have to decide which is better...

to live the life that brought you here....
or to deal with the side effects and have relief.....

I choose to deal with the side effects because I've had a full life of episodes and rapid cycling and deep depressions and ugh.... you know the deal...
been that way since I was nine
and everything it did steal

so to be contained inside and stifled in my creativity....
it's kinda like a security blanket for me
something that I can feel and depend on
because I am that desperate to feel better
that I don't care about the side effects
just please... please keep helping me to not feel that way anymore
and I will do what it takes to feel better

thank you meds! I owe you my life.......
the life you gave back to me.....