Thanks for all of the advice and kind words. I hear everything that's wrong with me more than I hear anything good about me and your kind words really helped get me thru today. I'm grateful that a community like this is available. Full of good ppl. If I could live in this community I would! Thanks to you guys the tears have dried for today and even tho I'm still very sad I'm alive. And I thank you guys for that. I tried to talk to my family and boyfriend but it was to no avail. Thanks again and I'm glad I can lean on u guys. Thanks and blessings!