Yes, I do have a lot of anxiety at the holidays. I am so sorry you are having such a difficult time. My children passed away in 1991 from a genetic disorder and I have not been able to really celebrate the holidays since. I have made an arrangement with my family so that we get together for Thanksgiving, just a gathering for those who want to eat. More of a day to catch up with each other rather than a day to focus on meal time. Christmas is then my day. I can sleep, watch tv, or whatever I want in the comfort of my own home. So, my suggestion is to try to make it more of a social gathering than a sit-down meal. This way you will not be forced to eat in front of others and can still catch up. Just try to get through it the best you can. I do understand and hope you can find a way to make it through. Let me know how things go. Lots of Hugs!!

Cindy