Hello people
I really apologize if this is not the appropriate place and form for this but I hope you understand me.
The thing is, I've been reading about bipolar quite often lately and I'm freaked out that I might have it
I would gladly visit a psychiatrist and get a full diagnosis but I cannot do it for some time, and till then I would really appreciate it if you could help me just for now by telling me if you think I'm bipolar or not in your opinion (don't worry you won't hurt me if you say that you think I have Bipolar
I'm not a quitter
never was, never will
so please be honest!!!)
My symptoms are the following:
Quote:
Phisical:
-Something like a mild Nail psoriasis on my lefthand index finger and my righthand pinky. It passed within several months.
-Last year I had some mild skin rushes around joints (dermatologist said it is probably just a winter eczema), but it passed after a year and this winter it didn't appear.
-Feeling exhausted 90% of the time
-Increased need for sleep
Mental:
-Foggy mind. I like to describe it as "feeling less awake than normal". It was like that basically since 15 years old and now I am 24
-Being the most sore loser in the whole world, guaranteed!
-Intensive anger. At the moments of extreme anger I am a completely different person, I almost bite
-Irritation, easily getting annoyed
-Tiredness, lack of energy and will
-Depression, lack of motivation, feeling empty
-Anxiety
-Weird feelings, not feeling like myself, feeling like my feelings have been completely mixed. I experience it mostly at times when I wake up in the middle of the night. (this is not happening as frequent as other symptoms but when it does, it is one of the worst feelings I've ever felt).
-Stressing a lot over both important and unimportant things all the time
-Being paranoid
-Hypersensitivity
-Sex drive sometimes goes through the roof, and that's an understatement. It's so impulsive and incredibly hard to control. Very rarely these days my sex drive becomes low, and when it does I feel like I'm 90% healthy (that might prove that this is my main problem and my biggest worry).
-Losing interest in something that I enjoyed just weeks ago! and then it comes back eventually, but then it fades again.
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So I definitely must say I have mood swings I have lows as well as those inspired, motivated, ambitious days BUT I can never remember a single time in my life where I have felt "out of control" or "weird" of how happy I am or anything like that, just simply happy and normal.
I just wouldn't call any of my happy times "manic", "hypomanic" in any way.
Now, some of my lows are due to me being paranoid about my obviously possible sex addiction / bipolar, and some come just like that out of nowhere (that's mostly related to the symptom I bolded up).
I think it might simply have to do with the reaction of my brain to repressing from almost all sexual activities for couple of months now, since those strong anxiety attacks started about that time.
Also all bipolars that I've met so far have high sex drive when feeling happy and low sex drive when feeling depressed...
for me it is opposite, when I feel depressed and anxious my sex drive is INSANEEEEE!
However when I feel happy and 100% myself again, my sex drive is very small (I wish I was like that always).
Last month I decided seriously to repress and calm even the damn adrenalin I feel in my stomach when I think of something sexually stimulating and since then I had few severe anxiety attacks (precisely the one bolded up in the list of my symptoms)
So I hope you can answer me, if I'm just a sex addict who's organism and brain are reacting to a sudden deficit of sexual chemicals, or am I bipolar who has been self treating my lows by abusing sex all this time? Or both?
I WOULD APPRECIATE YOUR OPINION SOOOOO MUCH! WHOEVER YOU ARE!
Thanks!