I despise myself right now. I am trying to hold the facade, to keep the mask on so no one will know me. Not like anything matters, because it doesn't. I am so sick to death of all of this. Therapy is going well, it will take time, but meanwhile I hate myself to death in other aspects of my life. BUt who cares, it is just me? I am doing fine with not contact still, but I am nonetheless angry at myself. I hate me now.