(((Mindinpieces)))
I've had a lot of the same problems ~ all throughout my childhood, as well as into adulthood.
For me, I have recognized that I can only maintain a couple of relationships. I've always gone completely into my friendships. I made a few friends over my life time, but I shared too much of myself with them, pushing them away. That taught me to hold myself back a bit. Don't always share every bit of myself.
I have a boyfriend (and I hold myself to that same general rule with him as well) and 2 daughters. My girls are young, and I've probably already shared too much of my honest thoughts and feelings with them. And, that's it.
It would be nice to have a friend or two! But, I know that I have a very hard time with trust and not really knowing where the correct limits are. So, it's kind of an ongoing struggle. Just wanted you to know that I can relate.

I am in a DBT group therapy though. Perhaps group therapy could help you learn appropriate boundaries as well as techniques to boost your self-esteem.