So, recently I have been under a LOT of stress. About a month ago, my brother-in-law suddenly passed away. Since then, my sister has been living with us. For those of you who haven't read my posts about my sister, I'll sum it up nice and simple for you: MY. SISTER. IS. EVIL.
No joke; she really is crafty, manipulative and very mean. She makes a sport out of making people feel as miserable as she is. I mean, we all are dealing with a huge loss too; her husband was more of a sibling to me than she ever was. They had a 2-year-old son together, and we are also living with that chaos :P (But, even if he's in his terrible 2's, he is really a sweet kid). She has Bipolar, bulimia, and probably some other issues besides that (but we don't know, because she has ALWAYS refused therapy). On top of that, because of how poorly she took care of her body when she was growing up (drugs, drinking, bulimia, etc), she is in constant poor health. But now, she's 2 months pregnant (She got pregnant literally RIGHT before her husband fell ill), so she has all of these horrible raging hormones ON TOP of the Bipolar, and she also can't take her medication. Her pregnancy is VERY VERY VERY high risk; she isn't supposed to do any lifting, and she is technically supposed to be on bed rest. Needless to say (no matter how hard we try to be gentle, understanding, and let things go), it has been hell living with her.

On top of that, I am in a day treatment program right now; however, next week is my last. The insurance doesn't want to continue to pay for me to be in the program, simply because I'm not doing the same "acting out" behaviors as the other kids (i.e.- I don't throw chairs or cuss people out; I internalize everything and end up becoming more and more self-destructive).

So anyway, right now I am tremendously stressed out; I have been to the point where I have felt suicidal, as well as self-harming every single day again. The thing that is worrisome to me is my physical health. I haven't been eating really well. I maybe eat one meal a day, if I can force it down. Otherwise, I literally have no appetite. I am by NO means thin; I'm actually rather obese. However, with eating so little the past couple of days, I am beginning to feel a physical toll. I am fatigued, faint/dizzy/lightheaded, really groggy/confused, and my emotions are even stronger than ever.

I just don't know what to do; I doubt that I will starve to death in the near future, but I still worry because I have a myriad of other physical health issues, including an autoimmune disorder. I worry about my physical health getting worse.... but I STILL can't bring myself to eat anything. I literally FEEL hungry, but then, when I try to eat (or even look at) food, I just feel like I'm gonna blow chunks everywhere. It's horrible!!!

SOOOOOOOOO............. anyone got any advice on how to get my appetite back, at least to a point where I'm eating the bare minimum to meet my nutritional needs?