I really do, voice in me is telling me get out, get out, run, break up with bf. It does get worse when things are going bad with my son. Bf is not a compassionate man, nor is he romantic or sensual or emotional. He stays over about once a week and snores worse than anyone I've ever heared of.

It's very black and white right now, I think I hate him. I think back on the past 7 years, when my little boy looked up to him, only to be let down. Bf is divorced, says he never wants to marry again. I am so bored with him, I'm not happy. We havent made love in 3 months. Now i'm getting thin again, he's eyeing me, and I don't want to give it to him. Not after his comments during my lithium weight gain.

He loaned me a lot of money yesterday. I need to figure out a way to pay him back and get out of this r/s with him. Thinking about selling my car and getting a small used one. I need to move from this area, away from bf. Somewhere where my son won't know any meth people. Somewhere easier to live for a single mom than in the rugged mountains.

But this isn't practical and I have nowhere else to go. I am really trapped and have nowhere to go, it's a horrible feeling.