(((LittleMe))),

Well, it is not about "retreating" from life. And often that can be "confusing" because PTSD can be tiring. The exercise is always good because it burns off anger and frustration and warms up the body so that the cooling down helps the body relax. That is also why you like the jacuzzi, heating up the body and then cooling it down relaxes the muscles and the body.

The striving for perfection comes from a need to satisfy the hypervigilance and gaining a sense of control. The problem is that we cannot truely gain "perfection" so the effort can bring on "anxiety and stress" and even anger. The house doesn't really have to be "perfect" and organized all the time, you can let some things go and just enjoy. You need to find a balance of doing the things that help you feel better but also not feeling like you "have to keep up with some mental perfection".

You do need a sense of structure and that is ok, but try to add in some structure that just gives you some space to "enjoy" and "let go" too.

(((Hugs)))
Open Eyes