Hello again,
Just a quick update.
Today was another bad day, and it finally pushed me to the limit. I have an appointment with my primary care doctor in the morning and I am going to be VERY frank about how I have been feeling. Hoping to get a medicine change and maybe new medicine to get my feelings under control, I have come to realize today that life if worth living and these feelings are not normal at all. Thanks to everyone who posted with me, it was a big help