Trust me, there are still plenty of things that I still need to get over but seeing how unapologetic he is makes me realize there's no point. It's literally a waste of time. The only thing I can take out of this is to be at least content that he knows that we aren't good and why we aren't on good terms. The part that killed me the most was him thinking that things were fine with me. Now that he knows, I find resolve in that. Sure I'd like him to own up to his negative contribution to my issues but he's too oblivious to see that.

My dad also knows how to talk his way out of things and flip the script. But he also knows that I see through his b.s. I sometimes think he's intimidated by me because I'm the only one who can challenge him on his intellect. Everyone else follows like sheep.

Maybe I will be able to "be the bigger person" but I just want to be allowed to feel what I'm feeling without it taking too much control of my life. It's like "screw him for messing things up for me but at the end of the day, I have to clean it up. Not my mess but someone has to clean it and he made it clear that it isn't him."