Woops, I meant to post here, not in "anxiety," anyway, here's my issue...

I feel like my OCPD is going to be the death of me. I started college at 31 and am now 36- and I still have 2 more years before I will get my Bachelor's degree. I have learning disabilities, so I understand that I can't go a the same pace as everyone else, but I can't even manage 3 courses and NO job. I attribute this to my OCPD taking on a life of its own.

I work so hard to complete my assignments, but I seem to never get any of them finished. When it's making a lesson plan (I'm an education major) I can't even make a decision on where subject or grade to focus on, so I usually have my professor pick for me. It helps to have that decision made for me, but then I get so hyper-focused on making the perfect lesson - which would be one that works for all learning styles, abilities, and level of language acquisition. My professors try tell me not to stress over it, but I can't help it. There have even told me they are more concerned that I know how to make a lesson, and less about whether it is perfect, but I can't seem to get my brain to accept doing sub-par work.

I'm so tired of having my professors tell me that I just need prioritize better and make time for schoolwork. They honestly don't believe me when I say that I spend 7 days a week in the library, almost always 7:30am-7:00pm. It's like they can't fathom that somebody could actually spend that much time working on schoolwork, and that doesn't even include the time I spend when I get home.

All of this stress has brought my depression back too, and because the depression has gotten so severe, my therapist is now focusing more on it than the OCPD. I understand her reasoning (trying to keep my suicidal thoughts at bay), but I feel that my depression can't get better to my OCPD is under control. I get my therapy from the Psychology Clinic on campus, so my therapist is a grad student. Each semester I get a new person, but it looks like I will actually have the same person for this coming semester. She's very nice, but she shifts the focus around a lot, so I really never have time to see if a certain approach works. I can't afford to go anywhere else, and I don't want hurt her feelings, but I just feel like it is all so hopeless.