Dear T,
Happy new year. I know you will be with your freinds and family and you told me your friends owed you some drinks so tonight will be a good night for you.
I don't want to contact you and disrupt your holidays so i will write it here instead.
I am so struggling to breathe and to stay alive, as you know t this time of the year is particularly bad and especially tonight as the last two new years eve my ex and I broke up and got back together and the past two years on new years eve I have found out she cheated on me and this year I broke up with my new gf today.
She turned out to be exactly like my ex, lies, cheats and has anger issues. She scares me.
T I don't know what to do anymore because life is not fun for me. I used to enjoy life now I struggle to stay alive day by day.
I really don't want to do this anymore, play a part I detest. T, it's time I made some choices about my life. You suggested I move out and maybe have a child. I don't know anymore if I want to do anything let alone live to have a child. T I hope you enjoy tonight and I might see you soon