I want to thank all of you for your thoughtful responses.

Hamster, I have not received a diagnosis of alcoholism by a professional, I just kind of diagnosed myself. When I go out to bars and start doing shots, it's over for me. I go overboard and do stupid things and usually black out. I struggle with the option to drink occasionally because I don't always do that. Like last night, I was at home with a few beers. Ended up having four. Big whoop.

That's why as someone said "in my heart of hearts" I don't know the right answer. That's why I asked the question. Some people think it's not ok to drink just because of the bp diagnosis but I don't know if I believe that. Again, why I asked the question.

As some of you know, I am very torn with taking my meds. I am torn with this diagnosis and I am torn with the option of drinking from time to time. I am in a place of confusion with all of this. I am on the fence and seeking answers and some understanding

Thanks to all again.