I was avoiding this thread because it hit close to home. But reading this post helped me understand myself a bit when I was with a guy who constantly borrowed porn and looked it up online, and made a disgusting sound every time a scantaly clad pretty girl was on tv. I used to wake up in the morning after he'd gone to work and find the sound turned all the way down and a porn in the dvd player, or, the spanish channel turned on with the sound down...he didn't speak spanish, he watched it because a lot of the women on those channels are half naked. I felt so inadequate, and didn't want him to see me naked, eventually not even wanting to sleep with him because in his sleep he would be trying to grab at me. In my mind he was dreaming about those beautiful women he saw on tv. It was so much more then a general appreciation for the female form. I just wished he would lust after me the way he did for the videos and spanish channels. It definetly is a harmful addiction. I guess I used to feel like I was just being a silly woman, until I read this post and realized my fears were valid. Thanks.

Rayna