Bruce is more mellow today; we talked like normal again.

I am so glad that I have learned enough recovery in SHMW that I am not holding myself responsible for Andy's death. Although my heart went out to him. The poor bloke wanted someone to be with him on new Year's eve. I just could not be there; we had broken up. I had told him he could call me or Ani.

I went to my 2nd pdoc appt and I am soooo glad I did! He is not forcing me on Seroquel, as I feared he might. He is impressed with my work. He will give me tranquilizers as needed and he asked me today "what *I* needed".

Whew...!

Good day today.

Also, I did not walk out of the beauty parlor today when I thought the guy at the desk was snippy. I looked him in the eye and said, "I need a touch up sir".

I was upset about that, but I handled it.

I was assertive with the lady who did my hair, though. I told her, "The man at the desk was a little mean today; he said I should have called ahead and I almost walked out."

She apologized for him and told me I didnt' have to call in but it would make things easier for me and for them. She was very nice and I enjoyed having my hair done.

BPD can be dealt with.

Carol