...first up to begin with lets just get this little complication out of the way ok?

..."I am hopeless...crap...a failure!"

now I am stripped down to beyond nothing almost perhaps there is more?

...yes!

I like my enemies much more than I like myself!

...therefore I must survive on the emotional credit of displaced memories and misplaced dreams.

I have not a freaking clue what I like past the moment I think I did!

...I hover inbetween human contact ....overwhelmed into indecisions and chronic social incompetence...and the clumsy intimate details are just pathetic...

I function...self medicated at about 0.3...
and it's a fine line

it all makes sense when I can shut UP! my self hatred!

and I can slide a bit

this aint new to me