This thread is really relevant to me right now. thanks for starting it and mind if i join?

i was talking with T yesterday about why i get totally triggered whenever i have to think about doing up my cv (i forget what its called in the US... the list of qualifications you send off to apply for a job). whenever i look at what ive done and accomplished i cant make myself believe in it. like yes i got a degree but i didnt really earn it because i had x and y advantages and because i did badly in a and b areas so that makes me think when someone sees my cv they ll see all the stuff i havent done instead of what i have and if they do see what i have done on paper and consider hiring me i ll really be cheating them because im not actually able to do the job... is that distorted thinking?

my T suggested i combat this by trying out my cv on some friends first and i will but im not sure how that will help because they still wont know what a fluke it was i managed to get these bits of paper saying i can do things that i really cant.

does anyone have any ideas how i can convince myself i can actually do what im qualified to and should i really do that and then risk being given a job and failing utterly to do it? i feel so much like in the last couple of places i worked that, worse than not doing the job sufficiently well, i was actually a burden to everyone else because i had to ask them for help on stuff and how can they give their full attention to what they need to be doing if they have to worry that im not pulling my weight?

i hope this is on topic...