Hi there. I remember so painfully well what it was like when I was 16 and in the throes of depression and other stuff. I was undiagnosed at the time and in a situation where my only "crutches" were religion and a profoundly dysfunctional 12 step setup. I particularly remember the crushing agony and how adult after adult insisted that it "wasn't that bad" compared to whatever they were thinking of as "bad."

Trust me, I know it really IS that bad.

I have just one piece of good news for you: You have gotten enough diagnoses to have some hope for some treatment that *can* work. This is something that I sure didn't have back then, and that lots of folks your age still don't. It really is a forward step, even though the labels and the process and stuff feel horrific.

Also, one thought from the perspective of someone easily old enough to be your mom who was in that kind of rotten shape at your age: Life can still be good. Sometimes the hardest thing is to just keep putting one foot in front of the other foot and moving forward an inch at a time.

I'm glad you posted and I hope you write more.