If you feel so suspicious and distrustful that you secretly go through your Hs things, imho, it is time to separate. There is no reason to make yourself sick over this. The only real "proof" you will ever have is if you catch him in the act...or hire an investigator to do the legwork. Which seems to me would not be a great idea, unless you have some sort of a prenup that includes ramifications of infidelity and damages.

Whether or not he is faithful is secondary to the fact that you feel you cannot trust him. That is huge. You cannot truly love someone if you dont trust them. Why waste one more second?

I hope you will put yourself first, think of your own feelings, and take action on that. You and your happiness and sense of comfort come first.

And most times if someone is cheating, they wont admit it anyway. Unless they feel as though they have too much to lose. Or the person they are stupid enough to get tangled up with ends up like the character from Fatal Attraction.

Have you considered changing the locks and throwing his **** on the lawn...including his filing cabinet, pants and "secret" phone?

Hugs to you.