I've been reading your posts hamstergirl and they touch me. You've been through a great deal and though I'm no doctor or expert in any way, I think you are perfectly justified in feeling frightened, angry, and sad. If you didn't feel those things, I'd say there was definately more wrong with your mental well-being.

I do hope you find some way to show some of those feeling to others. Sharing some of them here is a good first step (at least in my experience though my story is vastly different from yours). I think you show more strength and more courage, not by keeping silent but, by allowing others to see beyond the physical you.

I do also expect that your mental well-being often gets overshadowed by your physical limitations and needs. So much effort and time goes into looking after them that there must be little left over for the other. You are a fighter, hamstergirl....fight for that too.

Okay..for what its worth, that was my two cents. I'll be thinking of you.
P.S. I used to live in Kingston, Ontario. Not too far away from Ottawa. (Just a boring little bit of trivia)

<font color=green>Once in a while it really hits people that they don't have to experience the world in the way they have been told to.</font color=green> --Alan Keightley