it's only as real as I let it be
but it takes a lot of energy
to maintain this lifestyle of being okay
and i don't have it in me today

so I will have to be depressed
and i will hide it like the best
cuz i know what will happen if i let it show
they will try to fix me, this i have learned to know

that it is not okay
to be this way
and it's something that you have to hide
and to the rules i must abide

the rules that keep my family happy
so that they can forget
that my brain is crappy... lol