Hear you Cap'n...ain't got the foggiest...hurts to think about it most times. I too am fond of a good howling ARGH when need be. I don't come here often even though this forum is my main Dx.
I have read posts similar to yours though...and they all sound similar to my own experience. Are you using an anti-d to help with the depression resulting? Anything other? It's been noted that cognitive behavioral therapy helps. Finding someone with specific skills in that is difficult. It's an intensive approach ideally...but few places offer it to the degree it needs.
It takes work too from what I understand...no pill and/or talk therapy will dent AvPD much. A private pro would be great...one who specializes in CBT and isn't some overtanned wanker just collecting dough for a bigger boat. Well however great a good Private Doc is...you'll still be paying for his proverbial bigger boat easily enough. The private route is beyond most of our means.
ARGHHH.....
Well so long for now...welcome to PC. Brisbane Australia huh? Ontario Canada here...gee just down the road from ya.

Take care down there. Cheers!