Im freaking out about the bad thoughts and dont know what to do!!!! Tried a crisis chat w counselor last night. Bad idea!!!! Was not helpful at all n they were actually quite rude. They said some really harsh things at end....was long paragraph n right after i read first sentence they quickly closed chat w no warning!!!!! I dont get it. Only part of paragraph i had time to read basically said why are you on here bc people normally come here for help. Not my fault that their silly recommendations were not going to help. Just cant get these thoughts out my head n dont know what to do. Have to avoid hospital bc too physically sick to go.