Quote:
Originally Posted by Mr. Venomous
I thought I'd ask the lady at the local pet store if she would like to hang out with me; we seemed to connect when we had a 20 minute conversation in the store last week. She was there when I received my shipment of tarantulas.
So since I was there today I thought I would ask her if she wanted to hang out. Obviously she doesn't want to  .
It's been several years now that I have been without friends beyond sending emails and Internet chat rooms. Just can't find someone in my general age group that would like to spend time with me. And I am not referring to strictly romantic relationships, either. It would really make a significant difference in my life if I had a few, or even one, close friend I could talk to and spend time with, instead of always talking to myself and communicating through PC and Facebook.
Nope! All I can do is write letters to myself, hope someone sends me a message on the Internet, and attend sessions with my T. The loneliness can make me want to rip my hair out and, at times, die. I told another user that it has been so long since I've had a hug that I can't remember what it is like. It was in 2011 when I last made a suicide plan because I am so fed up of being rejected, shunned, looked down on, and being bad to everyone.
Do I have so few positive qualities that nobody I meet likes me unless they're paid to talk to me or are old enough to be my parents or grandparents? Am I really that bad?
Please don't tell me that I will meet a special person one day or any of that 'comforting' talk - I am too analytical and calculative for that to work.
I'll now crawl back into my hole…thanks for reading
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I literally could have written that...actually was going to create a thread along those lines. I just don't try anymore. I'm always very friendly to people I see around campus (still in school) or who ride the bus with me if they say something to me. The only people who want me around are people who are older than my parents...they're sort of an aunt and uncle to me. That's nice and all that, but like you, I'd like to fit in with people my own age.
I don't want to sabotage your thread so I think I might just go create my own thread, but it seems that it may be very similar...
Edit: We are different in the fact that you are trusting and I don't even trust people I've known my whole life. And I have avoidant personality disorder instead of Asperger's...so I don't think that's it...at least not completely. Sorry, I replied before reading the whole thread and keep seeing things I missed...