Hi Chrysalis, I wish I could offer you some advice or comfort but I too feel like a failure and hate myself. I just wanted to thank you for posting your thread. Your painting is beautiful. I believe your talent is a gift and your sensitivity a blessing. The combination of the two make for a beautiful human being. I've met enough insensitive people in my life and that hurts.

I see your teacher's apathy as their own weakness and perhaps a reflection of their own life problems. I would not attribute too much weight to their lack of interest. Your art may well be your ticket to a bright future. If I were you I'd just try to focus on what I need to do today or tomorrow. Try the best you can to learn as much as you can in school. Try to go out with friends and enjoy some simple pleasures like a movie or a good laugh. To escape your dark pit, I think you have an advantage that many don't. You have your art!! Clearly, your art is your escape from the darkness. It can be your means to express the depths of your feelings. Your paintings can project your hatred and your struggle to find the light. Maybe there is darkness today but tomorrow you may see a fleeting glimpse of light. You have the power to express your dreams of what happiness looks like in your paintings. Have you ever tried to display or sell your work? Sidewalk sales, flea markets, etc. I don't know all that is required to do this but certainly you can find out. You may be surprised to find that other people appreciate your work. I wish you the very best.