Quote:
Originally Posted by just2b
I have been thinking about this lately. My IOP psychiatrist had not seen me for a few months, and asked me how things have been? The answer wasnt surprising in any way, "soso, up and down, okay, fine". Now Monday the 14th, I am going to see my psychiatrist and havent seen her for 6 weeks. I have been wondering how I am going to answer the million dollar question, "So tell me how you have been?" I am at a loss for words usually, but come up with numb, depressed, okay, soso, or whatever. Then when I leave her office, I usually regret saying anything I said because I feel it to be a lie. Then after thinking about this even further, I have come to the realization that I often feel like I am lying about how I feel and how I am doing. Even in this moment, I have really truly no idea what my mood would be cateogorized as. Blah, unreal, fake, totally not sure. I feel as though I am not sitting here typing this but it is obvious that I am. It will play back in my mind like a dream. Fuzzy and sketchy. ....what I just said...will come back to bite me in the ***. I am now wondering how much of my memories are just that fuzzy and sketchy! Anyone following me!?!?! I just wanted to express this...I got the idea to write this after I read the post ...Is this depersonalization, and related in a way. I think. LOL.
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lol my treatment providers have all learned to not ask me such a loaded question like how have you been. my alters and I got so tired of hearing those kinds of questions. the result of our irritation and fatigue with these questions was our keeping daily detailed and I mean detailed right down to what time we answered natures call, what we saw what we heard. we even put in their our thoughts about people we were encountering during our days.
we would then walk in carrying a load of journals. when they asked how have we been the answer was handing over these journals and stating here you go, this will answer your question, now if you want to know how I am today that I can just tell you. It took my therapist three months to work her way through 15 300 page journals. and never again asked me such a broad ended question.
now she says hi hows your day going.