And it's pissing me off! Oh did I mention paranoid?

I spent the last month and a half at some damned low level of depression, well that's nice. I cope and then my brain decides nope, you can be wake up and be all over the place. This morning I say to my husband what's going on all miserable like well maybe cause I feel amped up like too and spend about 30 minutes laughing hysterical like over how he broke the coffee maker so, I say to myself calm down and I fall asleep for the rest of the morning and afternoon.

I was okay suppose now I'm wide awake and not sure of I want to dance and sing or bang my head with a hammer til I pass out! I wouldn't really do that of course but, f my brain.

Am I happy, sad or just anxious!!!!!!!!!!

Know what feeling I'm talking about?

My husband has bipolar too and says I'm mixed but those terms mean nothing to me, says he relates in those terms. But the ****ing jargon is my life!