I KNOW things will improve? That's a lie. This viscious cycle gets worse and worse with every round. Perhaps I could be so blinded by illusion but no. I feel nothing but wrongness and failure. I am a burden on everyone. I disappoint all those around me. I will fight this urge all night and go to the hospital in the morning regardless of what my hubby thinks. He's mad that I want to make him miss work. Ha!