To Everybody:

The poem was inspired by smells and sounds coming from my neighborhood. The aromas were only in my memory. I sometimes get this feeling of de ja vou but... not. It's strange to try and explain.

The main reason I'm dreading the holidays is that I do have quite a large family but distance and some family situations will dictate that I be alone this year. I may get to see my oldest for for a couple of hours, if I'm lucky and then I will be his last stop on Christmas Day.

The fact that I live in Southern California also dictates no colors... except maybe black this year, since all the surrounding hills are burning at the moment and have been all this month. The danger of flooding in the burn areas will be extremely serious.

Also, as we get older time goes quicker. It's going by too quick for me and most days I feel as if I didn't accomplish my purpose for that day. I'm going at a snails pace while Time flies by. It's the age factor, not my depression this time.

I'm getting old, in the Fall of my life and with the large family I have, I thought that finally, I would be surrounded by those I love for the holidays. Not so... Such is life. "With contentment I fool myself"