Tomi,

I can relate to your poem so well. Add to that, just the feeling of the cooler fall breeze rustling the leave outside my bedroom window. The feelings, flashbacks, nightmares are flooding back from only 2 years ago. Maybe if it was farther back in my past, the feelings wouldn't be so overwhelming. The worst part for me is that I need to jump to June in order to escape all these horrible feelings. That doesn't leave me with many functional months & even those haven't been functional with the heat here in Lancaster. I am lucky that my psychologist realizes that I am in trouble now.....he hasn't been able to see me at my usual time & has arranged to see me on another day because I just can't go that long without his help. Unfortunately, I can't affored to feel the way I am feeling....I don't have time in my life to be non-functional. I have so much to do, but I can't push myself either without getting even worse. I feel like I am in the middle of a catch 22 that won't be over until it is too late.

Your poem just made me realize that this is what I am going through....the feelings have been here, but not the words to explain it.

Thank you,
Debbie