Well, what girls/women like is a sense of "security" and "feeling safe". Chances are this other BF doesn't provide that for her somehow. And she gets emotionally "confused" by him. He is probably "imature" himself and doesn't know what "he" wants either.

The best thing you can do is "not pressure her" but instead become her "haven" where she feels relaxed and safe with you, able to just enjoy herself, relax, have fun, and explore.

If a girl is with two guys that are "needy" and "demanding" she will choose the needy one she at least is used to being with. In the end though, she may discard both of these "needy demanding men" feeling exhausted and confused and wait for some "more balanced" guy to come along eventually.

Honestly? girls get tired of "the I need you speaches" and even the "you are so beautiful, I need you, want you speaches". While you may be "considering "your" needs, maybe you are not hearing hers, or paying attention to who she is as a person as well. Girls in the age group you are talking about, don't quite honestly "know" what they want and often they just want to spend time with different men to see what they "do" like.

I understand that you really have strong feelings for this girl, but if you put demands on her and she isn't ready to make a choice, she will end up not wanting to see you at all.

My daughter would often "run away from or get turned off by the guys that "put too many demands on her, or the I need you, need you speaches.

Also, the "college years" are all about "self discovery" and both girls and guys this age group don't always really "know" what they want yet. So allow yourself to "learn" and give this encounter some "space", either it will evolve into something or it wont, but you can't "make" it happen. And if you try to do that, then the other person may feel too pressured and just disconnect.

Open Eyes