Hello, violinm9. Your husband apparently has been unable to forgive you. Feeling like an emotional prisoner is no way to live. It is understandable you do not want to break up the family. I expect, however, the children must feel some of the stress in the relationship.

Have you considered seeking professional help for yourself? You might benefit from exploring how your childhood has a bearing on why you are allowing your husband to abuse you. If he is unwilling to change, perhaps it is time to move on? A professional should be able to help you become more assertive or help you (and your children) to get out of jail.