I am so tired of fighting ana. Too many rules and regulations. Can't have that because there are too many calories. Can't have that because it might make you fat. You can have X calories a day and if you go above that you will become fat. I hate it. I can't stand it. I want to quit, but can't at the same time. It isn't fair. Others don't worry about what they can and cannot have, so why can't I? I am just about to the point that I don't want to go to see my dietician or my t anymore. I am ready to let ana win. After all that is what she wants, and all I want is for her to shut up. Maybe if she wins, she will be happy and will shut up. Who knows unless I let her win. I've got the towel, all I have to do is let it drop. It is getting rather heavy to hang on to. Maybe only days or moments left til it does drop. Then I am done.