No I don't agree that everyone that has been abused become abuser and everyone that has been rejected rejects others.

I have met many many survivors in real life who hold down jobs in which they have to deal with working with others and do so with no problems at all. and I have met many many survivors who have many many loved ones and friends in their lives. In fact there are many many survivors out there in real life that feel MORE comfortable having lots and lots of people in their lives due to the isolation and so on that they went through that comes along with abuse because if there are more people in their lives they are less apt to become victimized again. Perpetrators work to isolate so a majority of the survivors that I have met "deisolate" themselves so that they won't get abused again.

and as for abuse victims ALWAYS becoming abusers - No I have met many many survivors who do not become abusers and in fact there are many many survivors out there that put themselves and the abuse they went through right out there in the public eyes for advocasy for stopping abuse not perpetrating the abuse - Laura Davis, Ellen Bass, Karen Marshall, just to name a few very famious ones and then I personally was in a fantastic real time support group where there were many of us that went public and were not abusers but advocating for better laws and teaching teens and adults how to get out of the abusive situations.

and no I don't believe alot of us are here to stop the cycle of abuse and rejection - from reading posts here I know that people first came here because they had a problem be it depression, Schizophrenia, trying to find a therapist, Bipolor Disorder, PTSD, they have been sexually assaulted, and therapists come here to find out what suvivors go through so that they can help their clients better or like me their client has told them that they are here and invited them to come on it.

There are many reasons why people come to psychcentral and if that reason why they came here was because they wanted to break the cycle of abuse and rejection all the posts that that person made would solely be about the world views, concerns and actions for breaking the cycle of abuse and rejection.

We are all here because we had a problem and used the search engines and links to locate help for ourselves concerning those problems of having DID, Depression, PTSD, Bipolor, Schizophrenia, Borderline Personality Disorder being sexually assaulted.

Once we get here we support others as they to heal from their own problems.

Yes there are a few or more of us here in this SUPPORT group that are active and here in part to break their abusive cycles and rejection in their lives or they have personally inflicted but even then their main goal is healing from the problems that brought them here.

A person cant breaak those cycles on line. No matter what we do on line those cycles will continue in the real world. yea there are millions and millions of people on line and those that advocate and want to change the cycles can spread the word but like a person who has a history of suicide and self injury and so on it takes real time help to break cycles.

The way to break the cycle of abuse is to say no to our abusers and get real time therapy help for those problems.

The way to break a cycle of rejection is to allow people in your real time life. Its easy to let people on line "in" but they are not REALLY "in" we rarely have face to face contact with the on line people so we can type anything we want and hey if the person rejects us they are not REALLY rejecting us they are rejecting the words that they see on their screens. There are probably plenty of so called friends on line that some may in real life reject be it because of the persons race, religion, politics, beliefs,... how many of us in real life on our errends and so on actually stop to talk to someone who has less money then we have, look different because of a handicap or color or sit in real time support groups and because we don't like what the person is saying we know there is no way out side of that group a friendship will be... but yet here on line because those clues and so on are not right in our real life its easy to accept and not reject.

Its kind of like when I post my blog and there are people on line who reject and slam my personal experiences and knowledge with my having DID, my researching DID and so on.

People didn't want that stuff on the public boards or me here so a full out war to get my info and experiences taken off here and me banned happened. If people were here to break the cycle of abuse and rejection that situation would not have happened. People would have read my posts and accepted them for MY experiences and knowledge and used their ignore icons if it bothered them. and this is not the only situation that has happened here with the issue of rejection. From time to time disagreements pop up. if people werre here in part to break the cycle of rejection they would use the ignore icon instead of fighting by pm or on the boards because they would be accepting everyones views as that persons and it would not be taken personally.

Rejection of people here on the public boards has gotten better. more and moe people here are accepting each other. But when reading other peoples blogs I see many many situations where people here do still practice rejection of people be it those they meet on line and those they meet in their real time life. If they were here in part to break the cycle of rejection they would be accepting people everywhere not just on community message boards. They would not be rejecting people in their blogs and they would not be rejecting in their real lives.

And no Im not exempt from practicing rejection behaviors on line and in my real life. in my blog I reject the points of view that are slamming my blog. I do so by shutting off my comments area. My readers don't need to be subjected to reading name calling, swearing and so on. And when people do so by email to me I reject them. I do so by not replying and deleting the email. They can have their personal opinions of me that Im not rejecting. They don't like me because of what I post in my blog.. ok I accept that. but like face to face contact I dont have to subject myself to people who swear at me and so on. In real life I walk away from that kind of behavior. I let them have their say because thats their personal opinions and views and I walk away.

Rejection is everywhere no matter who the person is and what they are doing. I reject foods I don't like, I reject animals I dont like and I reject people I don't like. Rejection is just a part of life. Just like life and death rejection is always going to be in a persons life. I beieve there is no cycle of rejection. It just is. When someone isn't doing their job they are fired, when someones writing entry does not fit a particular magazine the person gets a rejection letter, when a person submits a manuscript for publishing they get a rejection letter, when we don't like a medication we skip a dosage or not take that medication - thats rejection, heck even our bodys practice a form of rejection - when we have a virus or bacteria the white blood cells kill off the dangerious bacteria and virus cells, we eat something and suddenly our bodys are rejecting that by creating an allergic reaction.

Everyone is different they have different tollorance levels, different points of view, different likes and dislikes and because of this there is rejection. the only way to get rid of rejection is if each and every person here and in our real lives were clones of each other.