Sinking lower today.
I know its expected, but I've been feeling so great recently. And now... its all kinda dawning on me. Yesterday night, I was on such a high.. I ending up running around town at 12.00am with a friend. Then that friend went away... and a guy friend begged me to come over...
I wouldn't say it was rape, because I never told him to stop. So realy, its my fault this ever happened. I'm just a little depressed.. I promised myself I'd never let him go that far. I've spent 3 years telling him 'not now', and for 6 months of that time we were dating. Now its all for nothing, just because I was feeling reckless...
Wow.

How can I avoid this in the future...? its so hard, when I'm on a high like that. At the time, it all made so much sense.

I'm 15 this year. I didn't even love him.