I guess its hard to explain what exactly bipolar "that is" unless you take about a two second's and glance at my appearence half the time.. and or just stike up any kind of conversation with me. I talk really fast and a try to learn a lil bit about as many things as im allowed! I am in an almost constant mania i feel like.. and I sometimes slip into a mild depression but usually a sleepy like coma for a few weeks or days depending on how stressed out i am. I try to explain to others and "loved ones" not to make exscuses but to explain as to why i had been a certain way.. Until recently i had barley began to understand my many issues and where they stem from or what to label them.. I faught hard to hold back many different emotional disfunctions during a relationship. I finally realized that i will probably never overcome my Mental disease.. And now am comming to terms with myself and all my flaws. First by identifying exactly what i should be working on to become a better and higher functioning individual.. "not going well" I want to just be excepted by those around me for the damaged individual that i am. To tell them that its okay that im
"damaged goods" I am okay.. Its hard to talk to people who have never encountered mental illness even in the medical world i am ousted as a "Purple python with wings" .. I feel like all the doctors want is a way to sedate me? Why must the drugs be so hard on my bady and make me feel so miserable>? Why is it that the types of people who want to help are usually "The wrong ones" ahhh i just want to thankyou guys for allowing me to post and for any reply at all..
I live in missouri
I am diagnosed
PTSD/Bipolar/Emotionally disturbed/OCD
I have been on a massive list of medications all most of which i do not know the names but that i am not on any of them at the moment.. And scared to be because of the also as equally as large list of severe "bad" side-effects..