Never blame your self, it took me a long time, but I finally have no regrets, you will learn to feel the same way. Most guys that age don't get it, they think with there man parts... Not with there heads lol. You seem to be very mature for your age and have a good head on your shoulders... Try not to stress it.

I slept with 13 guys from age 15 to 17 almost all during manic/hypo manic states, so I completely understand how you feel. I was around your age when i got my diagnosis. feel free to pm me if you ever have any questions, or need to vent.